The new supercomputer shows the increasing desire of government labs to adopt more technologies from commercial artificial intelligence systems.

To reach the manosphere, you have to know the manosphere.

AUSTIN, TXIn an effort to give the impression that they had been burning the midnight oil while CEO Elon Musk was away in Washington, D.C., employees at Tesla reportedly scrambled Thursday to make the office look like theyd been sleeping there. Elons going to be back any minute, so make sure to throw some dirty clothes next to the bathroom sink to make it seem like weve been showering here, said Tesla engineer Todd Costello, who appeared panicked as he scarfed down pizza and threw the crusts all over his coworkers desks, explaining that his boss would be furious if he found out the staff had experienced even a semblance of work-life balance over the past few months. Better start inflating the air mattress in the boardroom. Oh, and we should throw some used toothbrushes around the kitchen while were at it. While you guys do that, Im just going to piss in the corner real quick to get a rank smell going. At press time, Musk was reportedly too strung out on ketamine to acknowledge the state of the office.The post Tesla Employees Scramble To Make Office Look Like Theyve Been Sleeping There appeared first on The Onion.

A 37-year-old cryptocurrency investor was charged with kidnapping a man and beating, shocking and torturing him for weeks inside a luxury townhouse in downtown Manhattan, all in a scheme to get the mans Bitcoin password. What do you think?No amount of torture could make me admit to being into crypto.Nick Bastidas, UnemployedHopefully nobody like this ever finds out how many Dunkin rewards points I have.Lindsey Zemke, Podcast UploaderIts horrific to imagine having to spend weeks with a crypto bro.Chris Helt, Hydraulics HistorianThe post Crypto Investor Tortures Man In Attempt To Steal Bitcoin Password appeared first on The Onion.

WASHINGTONAs part of a flurry of legal actions in recent days that granted clemency to more than 25 people, PresidentDonald Trump reportedly pardoned disgraced Bravo TV star Tom Sandoval this week. Thanks to President Trump, Tom Sandoval will finally be indemnified against all the toxic Vanderpump Rules drama, said publicist Ashley Partington, adding that the 42-year-old musician and restaurateur was unfairly targeted for cheating on longtime girlfriend Ariana Madix with his co-star Raquel Leviss. The president understands that following your heart is not a crime, and he was willing to fight for Toms right to cheat with Miami Girl or to hook up with a bottle service waitress after absconding to Las Vegas. If anything, its Team Ariana that should be punished. She was a total bitch and is clearly just using all the free publicity to push her merch. At press time, Trump had announced plans to make the former site of Sandovals failed bar Schwartz & Sandys a national monument.The post Trump Pardons Tom Sandoval appeared first on The Onion.

President Donald Trump has frozen more than $3 billion in grants and contracts as his feud with Harvard University continues to escalate. The Onion shares a timeline of the disputes key dates so far.January 29: Trump administration accuses the Harvard Law Review of promoting violent pro-law rhetoric.February 3: The Justice Department announces the creation of the multiagency Task Force to Own the Libs.February 19: Trumps negative view of Harvard cemented after watching the Good Will Hunting barroom scene on Paramount+.March 6: Trump signs an executive order declaring that the president cant be accused of antisemitism.April 3: Harvard pressured to increase diversity of viewpoints by hiring more professors with successful AM talk radio showsApril 14: Harvard pointedly rejects the Trump administrations demands by sending his messenger back to the White House decapitated and strapped to their horse.May 2: Harvard asserts there is no legal basis for taking away its tax-exempt status, making it a near certainty that Trump will do so.May 1517: Brief respite as Trump forgets any of this happening.May 28: Trump demands a list of all international students names, countries, and skull measurements.September 1, 2027: Trump awarded honorary degree in exchange for releasing Harvard president from Oval Office bird cage.The post Timeline Of Trumps Battle With Harvard appeared first on The Onion.

CUPERTINO, CAAmidst the strain of tariffs, Apple CEO Tim Cook announced Thursday the launch of a new 7,083-piece iPhone kit. Apple customers will have a blast soldering, polishing, and drilling as they build their very own iPhone, Cook said in a Keynote presentation at Apple headquarters, touting the new product as an innovative, first-of-its-kind achievement and noting that the tech giants competitors were already scrambling to offer similar build-your-own products of their own. Based on your level of manufacturing experience, it should take anywhere between one and four days to assemble, not counting any bathroom or sleep breaks. Its the perfect family activity. Kids love it! It even comes with a free rock you can use to mine your own lithium. At press time, Cook confirmed the kit was exclusively available to U.S. customers.The post Tariff-Strained Apple Announces 7,083-Piece iPhone Kit appeared first on The Onion.

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This week is a bumper episode all about Flock, the automatic license plate reading (ALPR) cameras across the U.S. First, Jason explains how we found that ICE essentially has backdoor access to the network through local cops. After the break, Joseph tells us all about Nova, the planned product that Flock is making which will make the technology even more invasive by using hacked data. In the subscribers-only section, Emanuel details the massive changes AI platform Civitai has made, and why it's partly in response to our reporting.Listen to the weekly podcast onApple Podcasts,Spotify, orYouTube. Become a paid subscriber for access to this episode's bonus content and to power our journalism.If you become a paid subscriber, check your inbox for an email from our podcast host Transistor for a link to the subscribers-only version! You can also add that subscribers feed to your podcast app of choice and never miss an episode that way. The email should also contain the subscribers-only unlisted YouTube link for the extended video version too. It will also be in the show notes in your podcast player. ICE Taps into Nationwide AI-Enabled Camera Network, Data ShowsLicense Plate Reader Company Flock Is Building a Massive People Lookup Tool, Leak ShowsCivitai Ban of Real People Content Deals Major Blow to the Nonconsensual AI Porn Ecosystem

This year, the 3rd Annual BET Black + Iconic Soire made its powerful debut in Washington, D.C., and GLAADs Communities of Color team was proud to be in the building to help spotlight and celebrate Black LGBTQ brilliance. Held on May 25, 2025, under the theme Excellence Ascending, the evening brought together cultural trailblazers and [...]The post Excellence Ascending: GLAAD Celebrates Black LGBTQ Legacy at BETs Black + Iconic Soire first appeared on GLAAD.

While Pride month may be a time to hit the streets and let our rainbow flags fly, it's also a great time to catch up on all the queer TV and movies headed our way this month, too!This June sees the return of some of our favorites, including new seasons of The Gilded Age, The Ultimatum: Queer Love, Ginny & Georgia, and Squid Game. Its also introducing new, soon-to-be favorites like King of Drag, Iron Heart, and Ponyboi. But thats not allnot even close.Were feeling the love this month. Keep scrolling to see what well be watching all month longand where you can watch it, too.All film and series descriptions are courtesy of their respective studios and networks.Next Gen NYC - June 3Next Gen NYC follows a tangled web of friends raised in the spotlight or at least close enough for good lighting as they stumble into adulthood one brunch, breakup, and spontaneous decision at a time. Whether stepping out of their parents shadows or creating their own legacies from scratch, these twentysomethings are determined to conquer Manhattan if they can figure out how to adult first. Together, theyll navigate friendships, careers, and romance, proving that trouble runs on espresso martinis and questionable decisions.Where to watch: BravoStick - June 4In Stick, Owen Wilson stars as Pryce Cahill, an over-the-hill, ex-pro golfer whose career was derailed prematurely 20 years ago. After the collapse of his marriage and getting fired from his job at an Indiana sporting goods store, Pryce hedges his bets, and future, entirely on a troubled 17-year-old golf phenom named Santi (Peter Dager). Stick is a heartfelt, feel-good comedy about a found family and their relationships set within the world of golf as it has never been shown before.Where to watch: Apple TV+Ginny & Georgia (season 3) - June 5Georgia has just been arrested for murder during her wedding, ruining her fairy tale ending and putting the spotlight on the Millers like never before. It's always been Ginny and Georgia against the world, but the world has never come for them quite like this. Now, Ginny needs to see where she stands when push comes to shove Is the two of them against the world something Ginny really wants to sign up for?Where to watch: NetflixI Dont Understand You - June 6I Dont Understand You is a pitch-black horror comedy featuring Nick Kroll and Andrew Rannells as a couple on the verge of adopting their first child. The two set off to Italy to celebrate their babymoon/anniversary, but the language barrier soon leads to a series of very unfortunate events, plunging them into a waking nightmare.Where to watch: VODBMF (season 4) - June 6BMF season four continues the journey inspired by real-life street legends and brothers, Demetrius Big Meech Flenory and Terry Southwest T Flenory (DaVinchi), who created one of the most influential crime families in the country, Black Mafia Family. This season, as Meech and Terry fight to keep their American Dream alive, staying ahead of their rivals and law enforcement takes a toll on their relationship. The brothers occasionally put aside their differences for their common goals, but the events of what happened in Mexico will change them forever.Where to watch: StarzLoulou - June 6A closeted trans teen struggles with identity and harassment while seeking her fathers approval. Pushed to confession, she finds solace when learning her gender isn't a sin and begins her journey to acceptance, despite a disinclined family.Where to watch: VOD Clown in a Cornfield - June 10In a fading Midwestern town, the local legend of Frendo the clown becomes all too real as teenagers start to go missing one by one, before meeting spectacularly sticky ends.Where to watch: VOD Misericordia - June 10Jrmie returns to Saint-Martial for the funeral of his former boss, the village baker. He decides to stay for a few days with Martine, the man's widow. A mysterious disappearance, a threatening neighbor, and a priest with strange intentions make Jrmie's short stay in the village take an unexpected turn...Where to watch: VOD The Real Housewives of Miami (season 7) - June 11The Real Housewives of Miami returns to Bravo, and this season, loyalty is a luxury as friendships test their furthest limits. Relationship shake-ups spill into the drama by shifting alliances, setting the stage for new and redefined bonds. As families grow and opulence reaches new heights, the sunshine stays strong in the 305. Where to watch: BravoFUBAR (season 2) - June 12Luke Brunner is a veteran CIA operative who, up until recently, was on the verge of retirement. After his last mission in saving another operative, who just so happened to be his daughter, he's back and face to face with new villains. This one is an old flame from Luke's past who threatens to destroy the world...if she doesn't destroy his life first.Where to watch: NetflixMiley Cyrus: Something Beautiful - June 12A one-of-a-kind pop opera fueled by fantasy, featuring thirteen original new songs from the visual album Something Beautiful by Miley Cyrus.Where to watch: In theaters (Limited) Bonjour Tristesse - June 13At the height of summer, 18-year-old Ccile (Lily McInerny) is languishing by the French seaside with her handsome father, Raymond (Claes Bang), and his girlfriend, Elsa (Nalia Harzoune), when the arrival of her late mother's friend, Anne (Chlo Sevigny), changes everything. Amid the sun-drenched splendour of their surroundings, Ccile's world is threatened and, desperate to regain control, she sets in motion a plan to drive Anne away with tragic consequences.Where to watch: On VODEcho Valley - June 13In the edge-of-your-seat thriller Echo Valley, Kate (Oscar winner Julianne Moore) is a mother struggling to make peace with her troubled daughter Claire (multi-Emmy nominee Sydney Sweeney) a situation that becomes even more perilous when Claire shows up on Kates doorstep, hysterical and covered in someone elses blood. As Kate pieces together the shocking truth of what happened, she learns just how far a mother will go to try to save her child in this gripping tale of love, sacrifice, and survival.Where to watch: Apple TV+Sally - June 17Sally Ride became the first American woman to blast off into space, but beneath her unflappable composure, she carried a secret. Revealing the romance and sacrifices of their 27 years together, Sallys life partner, Tam OShaughnessy, tells the full story of this complicated and iconic astronaut for the first time.Where to watch: Disney+The Buccaneers (season 2) - June 18In the first season of The Buccaneers, a group of fun-loving young American girls exploded into the tightly corseted London of the 1870s setting hearts racing and kicking off an Anglo-American culture clash. Now the Buccaneers are no longer the invaders England is their home. In fact, theyre practically running the place. Nan is the Duchess of Tintagel, the most influential woman in the country. Conchita is Lady Brightlingsea, heroine to a wave of young American heiresses. And Jinny is on every front page, wanted for the kidnapping of her unborn child. All of the girls have been forced to grow up and now have to fight to be heard, as they wrestle with romance, lust, jealousy, births and deaths themes consuming all women of any age, no matter what year it is. Last time we got a taste of England. This time were in for a veritable feast.Where to watch: Apple TV+Dont Tell Larry - June 20After Susan tells a harmless white lie to her truth-obsessed co-worker Larry to land a promotion, things spiral out of control when the lie leads to tragedy, with all signs pointing to Larry as responsible. Fearing her secret will be exposed, Susan recruits her cubicle-mate Patrick for a series of escalating cover-ups that unleash pure chaos, turning their workweek into an unpredictable, all-consuming clusterf*ck.Where to watch: In theatersThe Gilded Age (season 3) - June 22The American Gilded Age was a period of immense economic and social change, when empires were built, but no victory came without sacrifice. Following the Opera War, the old guard is weakened and the Russells stand poised to take their place at the head of society. Bertha sets her sights on a prize that would elevate the family to unimaginable heights while George risks everything on a gambit that could revolutionize the railroad industry if it doesnt ruin him first. Across the street, the Brook household is thrown into chaos as Agnes refuses to accept Adas new position as lady of the house. Peggy meets a handsome doctor from Newport whose family is less than enthusiastic about her career. As all of New York hastens toward the future, their ambition may come at the cost of what they truly hold dear.Where to watch: HBO MaxKing of Drag - June 22History is in the making with the first major Drag King competition series serving you bold, brilliant, and unapologetic talent like never before. Hosted by the legendary Murray Hill, King of Drag brings fierce performances and a celebration of masculinity in all its forms.Where to watch: RevryIronheart - June 24Set after the events of Black Panther: Wakanda Forever, Marvel Televisions Ironheart pits technology against magic when Riri Williams (Dominique Thorne)a young, genius inventor determined to make her mark on the worldreturns to her hometown of Chicago. Her unique take on building iron suits is brilliant, but in pursuit of her ambitions, she finds herself wrapped up with the mysterious yet charming Parker Robbins aka The Hood (Anthony Ramos).Where to watch: Disney+The Ultimatum: Queer Love (season 2) - June 25Six new couples, made up of women and non-binary people, put their love to the test by moving in with other partners. Are they ready for marriage or is "the one" actually someone else?Where to watch: NetflixHot Milk - June 27Sofia travels to the Spanish coast with her domineering mother, who seeks a cure for a strange illness. A tantalizing world awaits Sofia, if she can escape her mothers demands.Where to watch: In theatersM3GAN 2.0 - June 27Two years after M3GAN, a marvel of artificial intelligence, went rogue and embarked on a murderous (and impeccably choreographed) rampage and was subsequently destroyed, M3GANs creator Gemma (Allison Williams) has become a high-profile author and advocate for government oversight of A.I. Meanwhile, Gemmas niece Cady (Violet McGraw), now 14, has become a teenager, rebelling against Gemmas overprotective rules. Unbeknownst to them, the underlying tech for M3GAN has been stolen and misused by a powerful defense contractor to create a military-grade weapon known as Amelia (Ivanna Sakhno; Ahsoka, Pacific Rim: Uprising), the ultimate killer infiltration spy. But as Amelias self-awareness increases, she becomes decidedly less interested in taking orders from humans. Or in keeping them around.Where to watch: In theatersPonyboi - June 27Unfolding over the course of Valentines Day in New Jersey, a young intersex sex worker must run from the mob after a drug deal goes sideways, forcing him to confront his past.Where to watch: In theaters Rent Free - June 27The sophomore film from Fernando Andrs (Three Headed Beast), Rent Free follows best friends Ben and Jordan, who, after hitting emotional and financial rock bottom, come up with a scheme to spend an entire year living rent free with the help of friends, family and strangers alike in a rapidly changing Austin, Texas.Where to watch: On VODSorry, Baby - June 27Something bad happened to Agnes. But life goes on for everyone around her, at least. When a beloved friend visits on the brink of a major milestone, Agnes starts to realize just how stuck shes been, and begins to work through how to move forward.Where to watch: In theatersSquid Game (season 3) - June 27A failed rebellion, the death of a friend, and a secret betrayal. Picking up in the aftermath of Season 2s bloody cliffhanger, the third and final season of Netflixs most popular series finds Gi-hun, a.k.a. Player 456, at his lowest point yet. But the Squid Game stops for no one, so Gi-hun will be forced to make some important choices in the face of overwhelming despair as he and the surviving players are thrust into deadlier games that test everyones resolve. With each round, their choices lead to increasingly grave consequences. Meanwhile, In-ho resumes his role as Front Man to welcome the mysterious VIPs, and his brother Jun-ho continues his search for the elusive island, unaware theres a traitor in their midst. Will Gi-hun make the right decisions, or will Front Man finally break his spirit?Where to watch: Netflix

Actor Supriya Ganesh, who plays Dr. Samira Mohan on the hit HBO Max series The Pitt, has discussed her coming-out journey and her adoption of she/they pronouns in a new interview.When asked about disclosing she/they pronouns on social media, Ganesh told Variety that this process is "absolutely a relationship with my own queerness as well as race."Despite being born in the U.S., the actor was three years old when they moved to India along with her parents and family. The actor added, "Coming [back] to America, I was very shocked by how restrictive the gender roles are, because in India you have the existence of a third gender."Though Ganesh acknowledged that they present femme, "There are a couple of times where I'm existing outside of that, and I don't always totally feel like I'm fitting into what I think is a very white-conceived perception of femininity."The actor added, "I also want queer brown women to look at me and know that that's someone they can turn to and relate to."See on InstagramGanesh also explained that she was inspired by Lily Gladstone upon disclosing this part of their personal life. "Even though I feel like I identify a lot more with femininity, that doesn't mean I always fit into what is a very Western idea of it. So I think that was why I made that decision."Queer fans of The Pitt who had already fallen in love with Dr. Samira Mohan now have even more reasons to love the actress who plays that character on the HBO Max show. Welcome to the family, Supriya Ganesh!The Pitt season 1 is streaming on Max / HBO Max.

Rene Rapp is getting candid about her relationship with fellow musician Towa Bird, and her description of how the two lovebirds met is hilarious. On the Tuesday, May 27 episode of Good Hang with Amy Poehler, the Mean Girls star opened up about why she thought it was so hot that her singer-songwriter girlfriend didnt seem to like her when they met for the first time. Bird rose to fame on TikTok, so Rapp knew who she was and thought she was sexy long before they ever met in person. "I just always thought she was so f*cking cool," the Too Well singer told host Amy Poehler.Rapp asked a close friend to introduce her to the British singer-songwriter even though Bird wasn't ready to meet someone. "I said, 'I couldn't give a f*ck less. I'm not either, but I'm gonna meet her. We need to at least be friends, Rapp explained.But when the two finally met, Bird was so f*cking mean to her. Luckily, Rapp was into it. She's scary," the talented 25-year-old pop star said. "Well, she's like from the U.K., so, like, her humor is super different. She's also just like, such a bitch.@reneeismotherrwe love you renee and towa we say in unison #reneerapp #AMAs #AMA2025 #lesbiansoftiktok #couplegoals #wlw #lesbian #towabird #podcast #amypoehlerRapp told Bird that she had heard so much about her, but instead of being flattered, the Drain Me! singer responded by asking, Why are you talking about me so much then?The second time they met, the two lesbians started talking about what cars they drove, and Rapp said that she wouldnt have pegged Bird for someone who owned that kind of car.Bird cheekily responded, Oh, you don't want to peg me?Poehler jumped in to say, She topped a top, which Rapp immediately agreed with. She literally topped a top. She out flirted me, she said. Despite their relationship starting with Bird really negging Rapp, according to Poehler, the 26-year-old guitar player was the first one to say I love you.While on the beach "high out of our minds, Bird said the three magical words, but instead of saying them back, Rapp didnt say a word and then asked her girlfriend to repeat herself. "And she was like, 'Are you f---ing kidding me right now?'" she remembered Bird saying before Rapp said she felt the same.See on InstagramElsewhere in the interview, Poehler helped Rapp come up with her drag king name and the results will have you giggling.When asked what her drag king name would be, Rapp was stumped, but the Parks and Rec alum came in clutch.Instead of Timothe Chalamet, you could be called Timothe Chala-Gay.Thats it, Rapp agreed.Watch the full episode below.

Drag queens and queer movies are kicking off Pride Month at the popular theater chain Alamo Drafthouse!Alamo is celebrating Pride by featuring a months worth of LGBTQ+ movie programming with ticket prices benefiting Pride365. But even more exciting than the films in the lineup is the drag star-studded PSA that will premiere exclusively before each film. The beloved theaters are famous for running Dont Talk PSAs before every film to prompt the audience to put away their phones and refrain from talking during the movie, but instead of the cute reminders most theaters use, for Pride Month, Alamo went in a funnier and sassier direction.This year, all Pride Month movies will start with a Dont Talk PSA starring drag icon Peaches Christ and frequent John Waters leading lady Mink Stole. Instead of sweetly asking viewers to try and be quiet, these two tough broads, who have been performing together for nearly 25 years, hilariously tell audiences to Shut up and listen to what we have to tell you.It will crack you up and make the price of admission well worth it. The PSA ends with the message, Dont talk. Dont text. Dont be an asshole. Truly, words to live by.Check out PRIDE's exclusive premiere of the new Dont Talk PSA" below!This funny and campy PSA will run before every film during Pride Month, and Alamo has an impressive lineup of queer films and campy queer faves that you wont want to miss.So what movies are part of Alamos Pride Month lineup?BoundBride of ChuckyThe HungerKnife + HeartFrankenhookerShowgirlsThe BirdcagePink NarcissusThe Broken Hearts Club: A Romantic ComedyBy purchasing a ticket to one of these films, not only are you getting to see a piece of queer movie history and watch Peaches Christ and Mink Stole reprimand you in comical fashion, but youll be supporting a good cause. This years ticket donation campaign benefits Pride365, which works to increase visibility and support LGBTQ+ businesses and community organizations not just during Pride Month, but all year long. Through the end of June, Alamo guests purchasing tickets online for any film (not just Pride programming) will be able to add a $1, $3, or $5 donation to their ticket purchase that will benefit Pride365 where donations directly support WorldPride and the LGBTQ+ movement across the country.

Lola Young dropped some truths about her sexuality over the weekend, and did so with a single line of text in a comment on a TikTok video.The 24-year-old British alt-pop sensation, fresh off her Coachella set and the Billboard success of her breakout hit, Messy, posted a video of herself dancing and lip-syncing to CMATs Take a Sexy Picture of Me while wearing a corseted grey hoodie and matching sweatpants.In the comments section of the video, one user said, no man deserves this, which prompted a response from Young stating, i like p***y as well u kno.Prior to this, Young has never publicly addressed her sexuality, though she did confirm to British GQ back in 2021 that the first time shed fallen in love was when she was 14.I believe in young love, for sure, but I believe love does not change depending on your life experience, she said at the time. The person [I fell in love with] was great, but it just wasnt right.She further clarified, I dont love love most of the time, but sometimes I do, and I dont like change, which means I like to stay in relationships as long as they last.Young has been a rising star since she debuted with 6 Feet Under in 2019, and Messy took the number one spot in the charts in the UK, Australia, Belgium, Croatia, Ireland, and Israel.=Overall, Youngs frank lyrics and unique sound have garnered her the attention, with Messy initially becoming a viral sensation after it became a TikTok trending sound in 2024.Following her success at Coachella, Youngs upcoming UK tour dates and festival appearances are also already selling out, and shes hinted at new music later this year. She has also shared more of her creative process on social media, giving us a deeper insight into how she works.See on InstagramHer comment about liking p***y was well-received by fans, who continue to admire her blunt honesty.@lolayoungggBe sure to follow her on social media platforms at @lolayounggg to stay up-to-date with her upcoming projects, and check out her tour page for details on upcoming shows.

Nature, Published online: 29 May 2025; doi:10.1038/d41586-025-01652-5Temporary device records eye movement and brain activity to monitor mental strain.

Nature, Published online: 29 May 2025; doi:10.1038/s41586-025-09183-9Mouse liver assembloids model periportal architecture and biliary fibrosis

Nature, Published online: 28 May 2025; doi:10.1038/s41586-025-09065-0A pangenome of the Cannabis genus including 193 genomes demonstrates high variability in most of the genome but low diversity in cannabinoid synthesis genes and provides a resource for future genetic studies and crop optimization.

Nature, Published online: 28 May 2025; doi:10.1038/d41586-025-01449-6An emerging fungal infection is endangering bats in America. DNA analysis reveals that the infection first arose in Europe, mediated by two fungal culprits.

Nature, Published online: 28 May 2025; doi:10.1038/s41586-025-09048-1An analysis of millions of scientific papers and patents reveals a pivot penalty when researchers shift direction, with the impact of studies decreasing rapidly the further they move from their previous work.

Al Nassr want to extend Cristiano Ronaldo's contract but face competition for the his signature, Fernando Hierro said on Thursday.

Chelsea have beaten Manchester United to the 30 million signing of Liam Delap with sources telling ESPN, with a deal close to being finalised.

Coco Gauff said there is room to "improve" the French Open schedule and that "women's matches are worthy of a night spot" as organizers feature men's matchups there.

TCU will open the 2025 season against Bill Belichick and North Carolina two years after opening against Deion Sanders' first game at Colorado.

Quarterback Justin Fields, who signed a 2-year, $40 million deal with the Jets in March, believes he "can be great" in New York, which will be his third team since being drafted in 2021.

by Jodi S. Cohen and Jennifer Smith Richards ProPublica is a nonprofit newsroom that investigates abuses of power. Sign up for Dispatches, a newsletter that spotlights wrongdoing around the country, to receive our stories in your inbox every week.Illinois legislators on Wednesday passed a law to explicitly prevent police from ticketing and fining students for minor misbehavior at school, ending a practice that harmed students across the state. The new law would apply to all public schools, including charters. It will require school districts, beginning in the 2027-28 school year, to report to the state how often they involve police in student matters each year and to separate the data by race, gender and disability. The state will be required to make the data public.The legislation comes three years after a ProPublica and Chicago Tribune investigation, The Price Kids Pay, revealed that even though Illinois law bans school officials from fining students directly, districts skirted the law by calling on police to issue citations for violating local ordinances. The Price Kids Pay found that thousands of Illinois students had been ticketed in recent years for adolescent behavior once handled by the principals office things like littering, making loud noises, swearing, fighting or vaping in the bathroom. It also found that Black students were twice as likely to be ticketed at school than their white peers.From the House floor, Rep. La Shawn Ford, a Democrat from Chicago, thanked the news organizations for exposing the practice and told legislators that the goal of the bill is to make sure if there is a violation of school code, the school should use their discipline policies rather than disciplining students through police-issued tickets.State Sen. Karina Villa, a Democrat from suburban West Chicago and a sponsor of the measure, said in a statement that ticketing students failed to address the reasons for misbehavior. This bill will once and for all prohibit monetary fines as a form of discipline for Illinois students, she said. The legislation also would prevent police from issuing tickets to students for behavior on school transportation or during school-related events or activities. The Illinois Association of Chiefs of Police opposed the legislation. The group said in a statement that while school-based officers should not be responsible for disciplining students, they should have the option to issue citations for criminal conduct as one of a variety of resolutions. The group said its concerned that not having the option to issue tickets could lead to students facing arrest and criminal charges instead.The legislation passed the House 69-44. It passed in the Senate last month 37-17 and now heads to Gov. JB Pritzker, who previously has spoken out against ticketing students at school. A spokesperson said Wednesday night that he was supportive of this initiative and plans to review the bill.The legislation makes clear that police can arrest students for crimes or violence they commit, but that they cannot ticket students for violating local ordinances prohibiting a range of minor infractions. That distinction was not clear in previous versions of the legislation, which led to concern that schools would not be able to involve police in serious matters and was a key reason legislation on ticketing foundered in previous legislative sessions. Students also may still be ordered to pay for lost, stolen or damaged property. This bill helps create an environment where students can learn from their mistakes without being unnecessarily funneled into the justice system, said Aimee Galvin, government affairs director with Stand for Children, one of the groups that advocated for banning municipal tickets as school-based discipline.The news investigation detailed how students were doubly penalized: when they were punished in school, with detention or a suspension, and then when they were ticketed by police for minor misbehavior. The investigation also revealed how, to resolve the tickets, children were thrown into a legal process designed for adults. Illinois law permits fines of up to $750 for municipal ordinance violations; its difficult to fight the charges, and students and families can be sent to collections if they dont pay.After the investigation was published, some school districts stopped asking police to ticket students. But the practice has continued in many other districts. The legislation also adds regulations for districts that hire school-based police officers, known as school resource officers. Starting next year, districts with school resource officers must enter into agreements with local police to lay out the roles and responsibilities of officers on campus. The agreements will need to specify that officers are prohibited from issuing citations on school property and that they must be trained in working with students with disabilities. The agreements also must outline a process for data collection and reporting. School personnel also would be prohibited from referring truant students to police to be ticketed as punishment.Before the new legislation, there had been some piecemeal changes and efforts at reform. A state attorney general investigation into a large suburban Chicago district confirmed that school administrators were exploiting a loophole in state law when they asked police to issue tickets to students. The district denied wrongdoing, but that investigation found the district broke the law and that the practice disproportionately affected Black and Latino students. The states top legal authority declared the practice illegal and said it should stop.

by Brett Murphy and Anna Maria Barry-Jester ProPublica is a nonprofit newsroom that investigates abuses of power. Sign up to receive our biggest stories as soon as theyre published. American diplomats in at least two countries have recently delivered internal reports to Washington that reflect a grim new reality taking hold abroad: The Trump administrations sudden withdrawal of foreign aid is bringing about the violence and chaos that many had warned would come.The vacuum left after the U.S. abandoned its humanitarian commitments has destabilized some of the most fragile locations in the world and thrown refugee camps further into unrest, according to State Department correspondence and notes obtained by ProPublica.The assessments are not just predictions about the future but detailed accounts of what has already occurred, making them among the first such reports from inside the Trump administration to surface publicly though experts suspect they will not be the last. The diplomats warned in their correspondence that stopping aid may undermine efforts to combat terrorism.In the southeastern African country of Malawi, U.S. funding cuts to the United Nations World Food Programme have yielded a sharp increase in criminality, sexual violence, and instances of human trafficking within a large refugee camp, U.S. embassy officials told the State Department in late April. The worlds largest humanitarian food provider, the WFP projects a 40% decrease in funding compared to last year and has been forced to reduce food rations in Malawis sprawling Dzaleka refugee camp by a third.To the north, the U.S. embassy in Kenya reported that news of funding cuts to refugee camps food programs led to violent demonstrations, according to a previously unreported cable from early May. During one protest, police responded with gunfire and wounded four people. Refugees have also died at food distribution centers, the officials wrote in the cable, including a pregnant woman who died under a stampede. Aid workers said they expected more people to get hurt as vulnerable households become increasingly desperate.It is devastating, but its not surprising, Eric Schwartz, a former State Department assistant secretary and member of the National Security Council during Democratic administrations, told ProPublica. Its all what people in the national security community have predicted.I struggle for adjectives to adequately describe the horror that this administration has visited on the world, Schwartz added. It keeps me up at night. In response to a detailed list of questions, a State Department spokesperson said in an email: It is grossly misleading to blame unrest and violence around the world on America. No one can reasonably expect the United States to be equipped to feed every person on earth or be responsible for providing medication for every living human.The spokesperson also said that an overwhelming majority of the WFP programs that the Trump administration inherited, including those in Malawi and Kenya, are still active.But the U.S. funds the WFP on a yearly basis. For 2025, the Trump administration so far hasnt approved any money in either country, forcing the organization to drastically slash food programs.In Kenya, for example, the WFP will cut its rations in June down to 28% or less than 600 calories a day per person a low never seen before, the WFPs Kenya country director Lauren Landis told ProPublica. The WFPs standard minimum for adults is 2,100 calories per day.We are living off the fumes of what was delivered in late 2024 or early 2025, Landis said. On a recent visit to a facility treating malnourished children younger than 5, she said she saw kids who were walking skeletons like I havent seen in a decade.Since taking office, President Donald Trump has pledged to restore safety and security around the world. At the same time, his administration, working alongside Elon Musks Department of Government Efficiency, swiftly dismantled the U.S. Agency for International Development, canceling thousands of government-funded foreign aid programs they considered wasteful. More than 80% of USAIDs operations were terminated, which crippled lifesaving humanitarian efforts around the world.Musk, who did not respond to a request for comment, has said that DOGEs cuts to humanitarian aid have targeted fraudulent payments to organizations but are not contributing to widespread deaths. Show us any evidence whatsoever that that is true, he said recently. Its false.For decades, American administrations run by both parties saw humanitarian diplomacy, or soft power, as a cost-effective measure to help stabilize volatile but strategically important regions and provide basic needs for people who might otherwise turn to international adversaries. Those investments, experts say, help prevent regional conflict and war that may embroil the U.S. If you dont fund the State Department fully, then I need to buy more ammunition, Jim Mattis, who was defense secretary during Trumps first administration, told Congress in 2013 when he led U.S. Central Command.Food insecurity has long been closely linked with regional turmoil. But despite promises from Secretary of State Marco Rubio that lifesaving operations would continue amid widespread cuts to foreign aid, the Trump administration has terminated funding to WFP for several countries. Nearly 50% of the WFPs budget came from the U.S. in 2024.Since February, U.S. officials throughout the developing world have issued urgent warnings forecasting that the Trump administrations decision to suddenly cut off help to desperate populations could exacerbate humanitarian crises and threaten U.S. national security interests, records show. In one cable, diplomats in the Middle East communicated concerns that stopping aid could empower groups like the Taliban and undermine efforts to address terrorism, the narcotics trade and illegal immigration. The shift may also significantly de-stabilize the transitioning region and only serve to benefit ISIS standing, officials warned in other correspondence. It could put US troops in the region at risk.Embassies in Africa have delivered similar messages. We are deeply concerned that suddenly discontinuing all USAID counter terrorism-focused stabilization and humanitarian programs in Somalia will immediately and negatively affect U.S. national security interests, the U.S. embassy in Mogadishu, Somalia, wrote in February. USAIDs role in helping the military prevent newly liberated territory purchased at a high cost of blood and treasure from getting back into the hands of terrorists is indisputable, and irreplaceable, the officials added.The embassy in Nigeria described how stop-work orders had caused lapses in oversight that put U.S. resources at risk of being diverted to criminal or terrorist groups. (A February whistleblower complaint alleged USAID-purchased computers were stolen from health centers there.) And U.S. officials said the Kenyan government faces an impending humanitarian crisis for over 730,000 refugees without additional resources, as local officials struggle to confront al-Shabaab, a major terrorist threat in the region, while also maintaining security inside the countrys refugee camps.In early April, Jeremy Lewin an attorney in his late 20s with no prior government experience who is currently in charge of the State Departments Office of Foreign Assistance and running USAID operations ordered the end of WFP grants altogether in more than a dozen countries. (Amid outcry, he later reinstated a few of them.) The State Department spokesperson said the agency was responding on Lewins behalf.In Kenya, the WFP expects a malnutrition crisis after rations are cut to a fourth of the standard minimum, Landis said. She is also concerned about the security of her staff, who already travel with police escorts, given the likelihood that there will be more protests and that al-Shabaab might make further incursions into the camps.In order for the U.S. to deliver its usual food aid to Kenya by the end of the year, it needed to be put on a boat already, Landis said. That has not happened. A nurse evaluates a child for malnourishment at a WFP-supported health clinic in Turkana County, Kenya, in April 2025. (Courtesy of World Food Program/Kevin Gitonga) In recent days, South Sudanese refugees in Ethiopia have begged a visiting government delegation from the U.S. not to cut food rations any further, according to a cable documenting the visit. Aid workers in another group of camps in North Africa reported that they expect to run out of funding by the end of May for a program that fights malnutrition for 8,600 pregnant and nursing mothers. Despite being one of the poorest countries in the world, Malawi has been a relative beacon of stability in a region thats seen numerous civil wars and unrest in recent decades. Yet in early March, officials there warned Washington counterparts that cuts to the more than $300 million USAID planned to provide to the country in aid a year would dramatically increase the effects of the worsening economy already in motion.At the time, 10 employees from a USAID-funded nonprofit had recently shown up unannounced at USAIDs offices in the capital Lilongwe asking for their unpaid wages after the U.S. froze funding. The group left without incident, and its unclear if they were paid, but officials reported that they expected countries around the world would face similar issues and were closely monitoring for increased risks to the safety and security of Embassy personnel. (Former employees at another nonprofit in a nearby country also raided their organization out of desperation for not being paid, according to State Department records.)An hours drive from the nations capital, Dzaleka is a former prison that was transformed into a refugee camp in the 1990s to house people fleeing war in neighboring Mozambique. In the decades since, it has ballooned, filling with people running from conflicts in Democratic Republic of Congo, Rwanda and Burundi. The camp, which was built to hold around 10,000, is now home to more than 55,000 people. A woman goes door to door selling secondhand clothes in the Dzaleka refugee camp. (African Media Online/Alamy Stock) Iradukunda Devota, a refugee from Burundi, came to Malawi when she was 3 and has lived at Dzaleka for 23 years. She now works for Inua Advocacy, which provides legal services and advocates on behalf of refugees in the camp. She said tension is high amid rumors that food and other aid will be cut further. Since 2023, the Malawi government has prohibited refugees from living or working outside the camp, and there has already been an increase in crime and substance abuse after food was cut earlier this year. This is happening because people are hungry, Devota told ProPublica. They have nowhere to turn to.Now, the Malawi government is likely to close its borders to refugees in response to the funding crisis and congestion in Dzaleka, the WFPs country representative told the State Department, according to agency records.Diplomats continue to warn the Trump administration of even worse to come. The WFP expects to suspend food assistance in Dzaleka entirely in July.The WFP anticipates violent protests, the embassy told State Department officials, which could potentially embroil host communities and refugees, and targeting of UN and WFP offices when the pipeline eventually breaks.ProPublica plans to continue covering USAID, the State Department and the consequences of ending U.S. foreign aid. We want to hear from you. Reach out via Signal to reporters Brett Murphy at +1 508-523-5195 and Anna Maria Barry-Jester at +1 408-504-8131.

ProPublica ProPublica announced Wednesday its joining a cross-industry effort to explore how artificial intelligence technologies can responsibly contribute to the work of investigative journalism. As part of the program, ProPublica will hire an engineer for the two-year fellowship. The program is supported by the Lenfest Institute for Journalism and will include four other newsrooms: The Boston Globe, The Dallas Morning News, The Baltimore Banner and Arizona State Universitys NEWSWELL. At ProPublica, the engineer will explore how machine learning might help its award-winning engagement reporting group, which powers many of our most ambitious, crowdsourced investigations. From callouts and tip lines to citizen-fueled science, these reporters gather leads and evidence from communities around the country. Were eager to explore how large language models can help us evaluate, categorize and route incoming tips more efficiently ensuring they reach the right journalist, faster. We believe these technologies have the potential to help our journalists and our readers find needles in the haystack, said Ben Werdmuller, senior director of technology. Were excited to explore whats possible in ways that align with our values and standards. As part of the program, the participating news organizations will work collaboratively with one another and the broader news industry to share what they learn, product developments, case studies and technical information needed to help replicate their work in other newsrooms. The goal of the Lenfest AI Collaborative and Fellowship is to help local news publishers leverage new AI technology to build sustainable businesses. The program launched in October 2024 with $10 million in support from OpenAI and Microsoft each awarding $2.5 million in direct funding and $2.5 million in software and enterprise credits. The Lenfest Institute is proud to partner with OpenAI and Microsoft to expand the AI Collaborative and Fellowship program. The five publishers joining the program are leaders in the field, and we look forward to sharing what they learn with the rest of the industry, said Lenfest Institute Executive Director and CEO Jim Friedlich. Together with Open AI and Microsoft, the Institute is committed to exploring ethical uses of AI to advance sustainable solutions for local news. About ProPublica ProPublica is an independent, nonprofit newsroom that produces investigative journalism in the public interest. With a team of more than 150 dedicated journalists, ProPublica covers a range of topics, focusing on stories with the potential to spur real-world impact. Its reporting has contributed to the passage of new laws; reversals of harmful policies and practices; and accountability for leaders at local, state and national levels. Since it began publishing in 2008, ProPublica has received eight Pulitzer Prizes, five Peabody Awards, eight Emmy Awards and 16 George Polk Awards. About The Lenfest Institute for Journalism The Lenfest Institute creates solutions for the next era of local news by investing in sustainable business models at the intersection of local journalism and community in Philadelphia and nationwide.

by Mary Hudetz ProPublica is a nonprofit newsroom that investigates abuses of power. Sign up for Dispatches, a newsletter that spotlights wrongdoing around the country, to receive our stories in your inbox every week. As he has promoted the Trump administrations Make America Healthy Again agenda, Robert F. Kennedy Jr., the U.S. Health and Human Services secretary, has lamented the toll that processed foods have taken on the health of Americans, in particular Native Americans.Prepackaged foods have mass poisoned tribal communities, he said last month when he met with tribal leaders and visited a Native American health clinic in Arizona.Weeks later, in testimony before the House Appropriations Committee, he said processed foods had resulted in a genocide among Native Americans, who disproportionately live in places where there are few or no grocery stores.One of my big priorities will be getting good food high-quality food, traditional foods onto the reservation because processed foods for American Indians is poison, Kennedy told the committee. Healthy food is key to combating the high rates of chronic disease in tribal communities, he said.Yet even as the president tasks Kennedys agency and the U.S. Department of Agriculture with improving healthy eating programs, the USDA has terminated the very program that dozens of tribal food banks say has helped them provide fresh, locally produced food that is important to their traditions and cultures.That program the USDAs Local Food Purchase Assistance Cooperative Agreement program began under President Joe Biden in late 2021 as a response to challenges accessing food that were magnified by the pandemic. Its goal was to boost purchases from local farmers and ranchers, and the funding went to hundreds of food banks across the country, including 90 focused on serving tribes. In March, the Trump administration decided the program did not align with its priorities. Agriculture Secretary Brooke Rollins defended the cut of a half-billion dollars by calling the program a remnant of the COVID era.The Department of Health and Human Services did not immediately respond to a request for comment. But in a statement, a USDA spokesperson said the department continues to distribute hundreds of millions of dollars through more than a dozen other nutrition programs that help families meet their nutrition needs. For tribal communities, the spokesperson said, that includes the Food Distribution Program on Indian Reservations for low-income households.When that program started in the 1970s, it offered processed foods colloquially known as commodities. Over the years, the government has added salmon, frozen chicken, produce and other more nutritious options for tribes to include in recipients monthly food packages. But few tribes who participate in the Food Distribution Program can purchase food directly from farmers and ranchers, as they were able to do with the now-canceled grant program. Instead, most choose from the USDAs list of approved and available foods.Kelli Case, an attorney for the Indigenous Food and Agriculture Initiative at the University of Arkansas, said the program cut by the Trump administration was widely considered an overwhelming success because tribes selected foods based on their nutritional needs and what people actually want to eat.Having the opportunity to tailor a program makes a huge difference, she said.On reservations, the problems addressed by the now-canceled program had been an issue for generations, perpetuated by a string of federal policies, Case added. The pandemic merely highlighted and exacerbated those issues, she said.For instance: In the 1800s, tribes in the West began losing access to traditional food sources such as berries, salmon and bison even though treaties promised tribes the right to hunt and fish. Some were removed from their homelands.The federal government instead provided tribal members with food rations flour, lard, sugar, coffee and other staples. At the same time, the forcible removal of Native children to boarding schools upended families ability to pass along knowledge about the foods they hunted and harvested.The now-canceled grants helped fill a void, tribes said. First image: Jason Belcourt, the Chippewa-Cree Tribes sustainability coordinator. Second image: Two of the tribes bison bulls at the Buffalo Child Ranch. (Aaron Agosto for ProPublica) On the Rocky Boys Indian Reservation, in an especially remote stretch of Montana, Jason Belcourt said he believed the Chippewa-Cree Tribe was finally getting closer to providing nutritious, local food to every tribal member in need. He expects the tribes USDA funding for local food purchases to run out within weeks. The funding $400,000 in the past several years helped the tribe buy beef and produce from local ranchers and farmers. The money supplied roughly 250 households on a reservation where the nearest supermarket is about 20 miles away.We wanted to make sure that we didnt turn away anybody, Belcourt said. There are families that go without meals; there are kids that go without meals.The tribe also used the money to help harvest bison from the tribes herd, which Belcourt said has done wonders, not only in terms of the food value. The harvests became community events where younger tribal members learned how their ancestors butchered and used the buffalo. A sense of tribal identity was being restored, he said. Theres a lot of cultural sharing. Theres a lot of remembrance from the old timers of what their grandparents told them and how to use the buffalo, Belcourt said. And, believe it or not, theres some healing thats going on.The harvests will continue, Belcourt said. But its unclear how he will make up for the loss of $150,000 in funding that the USDA previously awarded the tribe for local food purchases over the next year.Other tribes are similarly concerned about the future.The Walker River Paiute in Nevada was the first to receive one of the grants to source local food, including $249,091 in 2022. The community, 115 miles southeast of Reno, used most of the money on locally sourced produce and eggs, according to the USDA. Of the reservations 830 residents, both Native American and not, 40% had received food purchased using the grant, according to the tribe.I truly believe no one knows the needs of our tribal citizens better than the tribe, Amber Torres, then the tribes chairman, said in a news release.In late March, a dozen nonprofits that advocate for Native Americans sent a letter to USDA Secretary Rollins, urging her to reinstate the critical program as a step toward respecting the sovereign status of tribes. At a recent meeting with USDA officials, tribal leaders again emphasized that they want a say over the food distributed on their reservations. First image: A community garden run by the Help Lodge to foster food sovereignty and sustainability on the Rocky Boy's Reservation. Second image: Empty planter shelves in an unused greenhouse at the Help Lodge. Funding cuts have made it difficult to maintain a full staff. (Aaron Agosto for ProPublica) Tribal communities still have access to the handful of federal food programs. However, last year, the Government Accountability Office, the watchdog arm of Congress, found that some posed barriers to peoples ability to get the food they want or need.For example, individuals who accept the commodity programs offerings cannot also receive assistance through the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program, commonly known as food stamps. As a result, a households needs can go unmet. Sometimes SNAP offers essential cooking ingredients oil, seasoning or yeast that the commodity program may not provide, according to the study.(The local food program was not included in the GAO report.) On the Fort Belknap Reservation in Montana, the USDAs local food program had become a reliable fixture, especially since the federal commodity program was paused there, said Tescha Hawley, who is Gros Ventre, or Aaniiih, and a social worker on the reservation. Structural problems had shuttered the building where the commodity program food was warehoused.A nonprofit Hawley founded, Day Eagle Hope Project, helped her tribe secure $2 million from the USDA to buy fresh local food and process bison meat from its herd. Assiniboine and Gros Ventre tribal members who are capable of gathering wild, nutrient-rich berries exchange them for payment through the grant. She distributed the food first from a shipping container on her property and later a community center.Over the past few years, the tribe and her nonprofit have distributed thousands of pounds of food. She anticipates the money that remains from past grant funding cycles will run out this winter. For people who can get to a grocery store, up to 45 miles away from some of the reservations communities, many will have to make SNAP benefits stretch at a time when food prices are rising.So that means even less food for the month, Hawley said. People will go without.Belcourt said he has begun seeking other grants, and a tribal staffer makes runs to collect food donations in Havre, more than 20 miles away, and Great Falls, about 90 miles away.We don't have a Plan B, Belcourt said of the abruptly canceled grant. Given the short notice, its tough to find a funder in that timeframe.

Trumpism can be seen as a giant attempt to amputate the highest aspirations of the human spirit and to reduce us to our most primitive, atavistic tendencies.

From the first winning word (gladiolus) to the use of fast-paced spell-offs, the Scripps National Spelling Bee has endured for 100 years.

He worked with a team at the University of Utah to create a mechanical heart. It was later used in patients awaiting an organ transplant.

As students gathered with family and friends for commencement, signs of the universitys fight with the Trump administration took many forms.

A federal judge said she would issue a temporary order that would prevent the Trump administration from blocking the schools ability to enroll international students.

CHICAGOAfter forgetting to bring sufficient entertainment for the two-hour flight from Atlanta to OHare Airport, area man Kenneth Vargas reportedly spent his entire time aboard a plane Thursday reading War And Peace over the shoulder of the passenger seated in the row ahead of him. I felt like an idiot for not downloading any books on my Kindle, but when I noticed the guy in front of me was reading something, I figured I could just look off of his, Vargas said of the mans print copy of Leo Tolstoys roughly 1,300-page seminal Russian epic. While I really didnt know who all the characters were, I think I mostly got the gist of it. At first I was just casually reading to amuse myself, but now Im honestly kind of invested. During drink service I missed a couple pages, so Im not exactly sure what happened with Natasha Rostova. I think I can pretty much fill in the blanks, though. As he exited the aircraft, Vargas confirmed he was disappointed the flight had ended before he had time to finish the novel.The post Whole Flight Spent Reading War And Peace Over Shoulder Of Passenger Ahead appeared first on The Onion.

NEW YORKWith unexplained natural phenomena having predicted seven of the last eight market collapses, experts confirmed the likelihood of a recession had increased Thursday amid reports that herds of panicked economists had started running off cliffs. We still dont know what causes them to do it, but economists can naturally sense a recession in the air, which triggers a mass panic and leads to these self-destructive stampedes, said J.P. Morgan analyst Rebecca Herrera, who explained that before the Great Recession began in late 2007, thousands of spooked economists started running headlong off sheer drops into the canyons of the Colorado River. Even as the bloody, broken bodies of Ivy League economics professors and Federal Reserve employees pile up on the rocks below, they will continue to throw themselves over the edge with no regard for their own life. While economists do tend to exhibit herd behavior, they will usually steer clear of dangerous river crossings and cliffs. Sometimes you get a scattering of individual jumps after a routine market downturn, but large economist stampedes like this always indicate a full-scale general recession. Some think they possess an instinct to sacrifice themselves when they sense lean times ahead, and it may be a behavior that evolved to thin the herd before mass layoffs. At press time, the S&P 500 was rallying and forecasts of a recession were declining after a mass die-off of private equity owners.The post Recession Forecasts Jump After Herds Of Panicked Economists Start Running Off Cliffs appeared first on The Onion.

MEMPHIS, TNIn a last-ditch effort to keep the lights on, the Memphis Science Center confirmed it had opened a new interactive exhibit this week that lets kids figure out how to manage the budget shortfall that, if it is not dealt with, will soon shutter the museum. Through our Fun With Funding Cuts display, children get a chance to resolve the devastating capital shortage thats going to force us to close by the end of the year, museum curator Colleen Gannon said while walking through the exhibit, which features a wall of spreadsheets that children can fill in via a 10-by-10-foot calculator built into the floor. Kids gain hands-on experience with the painful realities of keeping a cultural institution running on a shoestring budget. Weve got a telephone where they can make fundraising calls and get rejected. Plus, theres a whole light-up display that walks them through how to apply for federal grants, be denied, reapply, win the grant, and then watch in despair as the administration guts the agency. We hope this gets guests thinking creatively about allocating an ever-shrinking pool of money, and more importantly, we hope someone can solve it for us! At press time, it was announced that the museum had been purchased by a private equity firm and would be turned into condos.The post Interactive Exhibit Lets Kids Figure Out How To Manage Budget Shortfall That Will Otherwise Shutter Museum appeared first on The Onion.

WASHINGTONAlthough the mysterious stranger has been spotted both on Air Force One and at Mar-a-Lago, an administration official confirmed Wednesday that nobody in the White House was sure who the guy praying over President Donald Trump is. All anyone knows about this dude is that he showed up at a meeting with the Pentagon top brass a few weeks ago to lead a prayer, and hes been by the presidents side ever since, said the official, who spoke to reporters on the condition of anonymity, adding that the man often appears to be in a trance and speaks in tongues while hovering his hands above Trumps head. When journalists asked about his identity, the press secretary called them enemies of the state who need to mind their own damn business, but the truth is we dont have a clue who this man is or if he might be dangerous. No one in the media, the FBI, or even the general public has been able to put a name to the face. The Secret Service has confiscated, like, six snakes from the guy, but he keeps showing up with more and is always handling them in the Oval Office. At press time, Trump had reportedly appointed the mysterious stranger as the new head of the Federal Reserve.The post Nobody In White House Sure Who Guy Praying Over Trump Is appeared first on The Onion.

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After the shocking season two finale ofThe Last of Uswhere the fate of Ellie has been left up in the air, star of the critically acclaimed and GLAAD Media Award-winning HBO series Bella Ramsey is the cover model of the Pride Month issue ofThem. Ramsey had an in-depth conversation with Themwriter Peyton Dix about many [...]The post Bella Ramsey Graces Pride Month Cover of Them; Talks Queerness in The Last of Us and Allyship of Pedro Pascal first appeared on GLAAD.

J.K. Rowling is using her wealth attained from the Harry Potter series to create an organization dedicated to removing transgender people's rights "in the workplace, in public life, and in protected female spaces.The author announced in a Saturday post to X, formerly Twitter, that she would be founding the J.K. Rowling Womens Fund (JKRWF) using her personal fortune. The website for the group states that it offers legal funding support to individuals and organisations fighting to retain womens sex-based rights in the workplace, in public life, and in protected female spaces.Sign up for the PRIDE.com Newsletter to get a candid take on whats fresh and fun in LGBTQ+ culture this week!I looked into all options and a private fund is the most efficient, streamlined way for me to do this, she said. Lots of people are offering to contribute, which I truly appreciate, but there are many other womens rights orgs that could do with the money, so donate away, just not to me!It is not the first time Rowling has used her over $1 billion net worth to influence legal cases involving so-called "womens sex-based rights" a dog whistle used by her and other anti-trans activists to exclude trans people from public spaces and reduce women to their genitals. Rowling donated 70,000 (roughly $88,200) to the anti-trans group For Women Scotland in 2024 after it lost its challenge to a 2018 Scottish law that legally recognized trans women as women. The group appealed its case to the U.K. Supreme Court, which ruled last month that trans women arent considered women under the nations Equality Act. Rowling responded to the decision by posting a picture of her having a drink and smoking a cigar, with the text I love it when a plan comes together. The post was widely criticized, including by The Mandalorian and The Last of Us star Pedro Pascal, who called it serious Voldemort villain s---" and referred to Rowling as a "heinous loser." Pascal, whose younger sister Lux is trans, urged his followers to not "buy a single Harry Potter thing ever," including by boycotting the upcoming HBO series and attractions at Universal Studios theme parks.Its time to tell these corporations that transphobia loses money," he said.