Is 'queer signaling' still a thing in 2025, and how important is it to know the secret code?
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Queer signaling has been a vital part of LGBTQ+ culture for centuries, providing a way for queer individuals to recognize and connect with one another in both safe and unsafe spaces. While the internet and social media have changed the way queer people find community, the resurgence of certain coded signals suggests that in 2025, queer people are once again leaning into these subtle (and sometimes not-so-subtle) identifiers. But what exactly is queer signaling, and why does it matter today?What is queer signaling and why does it exist?Queer signaling refers to the use of fashion, accessories, language, and behavior to discreetly indicate ones LGBTQ+ identity to others in the community.Licensed sexologist and relationship therapist Sofie Roos describes it to PRIDE as ways for queer people to signal to others, primarily people within the community, that they are queer. These signals can range from obvious markers like pride pins and rainbow tattoos to more nuanced cultural cues that are only recognized by those in the know.Historically, queer signaling developed out of necessity. Before the internetand in times when queerness was criminalizedLGBTQ+ people had to find creative ways to identify each other without outing themselves to the wrong crowd. Oscar Wilde popularized the use of green carnations in the late 19th century, the 1970s saw the rise of the hanky code, and lesbian communities have long used subtle fashion cues like short nails, rings on specific fingers, and undercuts.Today, while queer visibility is more widespread, Roos explains that signaling still plays an important role. Knowing about queer signaling makes it easier to connect with other queer people and fosters a sense of belonging, whether youre looking for socialization, a partner, or both.How has queer signaling changed in the modern era?With the rise of online spaces, social media bios, and dating apps, queer people no longer rely solely on in-person signals to find each other.Edward Reese, a gender and sexuality expert at Taimi and trans nonbinary activist, tells PRIDE that younger generations often use digital signaling, such as mentioning certain queer-coded artists (e.g., asking Do you listen to Girl in Red? as a subtle sapphic inquiry) or using emoji-based codes in their profiles.However, as LGBTQ+ rights face new challenges and state-level discrimination rises, Reese suggests that traditional queer signaling is making a comeback. Queer TikTok influencers have already reintroduced the hanky code, he explains. This code could prove particularly useful as it remains somewhat complex and less recognizable to straight [people] compared to more mainstream signals like earrings for men or thumb rings for women.In addition to digital spaces, queer signaling continues to evolve in everyday fashion. While classic queer fashion elements like flannels, Doc Martens, and carabiners have been co-opted by the mainstream, LGBTQ+ individuals have developed newer, more nuanced cues that help maintain in-group recognition.Recognizing modern queer signalsThough queer people can dress however they please, certain fashion choices and behaviors have remained strong indicators of queerness. According to Roos, here are some common signals still in use today:For queer women and nonbinary sapphics:Short nailsThumb rings and chunky jewelryBackward caps and mulletsPiercings, especially nose or eyebrow piercingsDoc Martens, Blundstones, or chunky bootsCarabiners clipped to belt loopsBaggy flannel shirts and oversized button-upsFor queer men and masc-presenting people:Painted nails and dangle earringsCrop tops and mesh shirtsCrossbody bags and scarvesWearing a scarfShort shortsWearing makeupWhile these signals provide a way for queer people to recognize each other, both Roos and Reese warn that some signals have been diluted by mainstream adoption. For instance, straight men now frequently wear painted nails and earrings, while sapphic styles like carabiners and flannels have been embraced by granola aesthetics. This has made it harder for queer people to tell if someone is actually signaling or just following a trend.Common misinterpretations of queer signalingWhile queer signaling helps LGBTQ+ individuals connect, it can sometimes lead to misunderstandings. Reese points out that straight people unknowingly adopting queer-coded fashion can cause frustration in the community. The comedy song Is She Queer or Just a Hipster? gained popularity in 2023, highlighting our frustration with straight women appropriating sapphic symbols for fashion, he explains.Additionally, not all queer people engage in signaling, and some may present in traditionally gender-normative ways for personal, cultural, or safety reasons. Empowering queer identity through signalingDespite the challenges of mainstream appropriation, queer signaling remains an empowering tool for LGBTQ+ individuals. Roos believes that wearing visible queer-coded items can provide confidence and a sense of solidarity. Using queer signaling is both made with sexual or romantic intent for finding a queer person that finds you interesting and attractive, but also to find friends within the LGBTQ+ community that you can bond with, she says.Reese also emphasizes that queer people should be intentional about their signaling, but also the danger of falling into segregation due to the signals.For years, queer signaling served as a way to connect with our community amid a crowd. Now, I fear we might revert to its original purpose: concealing our identities from those we prefer not to engage with. While this can feel empowering, the need for a symbolic language in 2025 saddens me, he says.As queer visibility continues to shift, so too will the ways LGBTQ+ people signal to each other. While the days of monocles and lavender flowers may be behind us, modern queer signals still serve as an important way to find connection in an ever-changing world.
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